Pearl Lorentzen
I treat everywhere I live like a small town. By this I mean, I live within walking distance of university or school and choose the closest grocery store to be my default.
Part of this is growing up Three Hills, AB where you can walk the around the outskirts of town in an hour. I like having a set my neighbourhood and the familiarity this brings.
At a Rural Mental Health Network conference at the beginning of October, I was introduced to the concept of neighbouring. The speaker, Howard Lawrence, grew up in a community of five or so houses along a highway in northern British Columbia. His neighbours were interacted like a close extended family. The older couple were basically adopted grandparents. The kids all played together like close cousins.
Lawrence spoke about how people no matter where they live want that ‘small town’ feel.
Lawrence now lives in Edmonton, but has built that same ‘small town’ feel on his block and neighbourhood. Edmonton is divided into clearly defined neighbourhoods, each around 1,000 households. In the city, people will say I’m from Oliver or Mill Woods, etc.
In the Slave Lake, Wabasca, High Prairie, Falher, and Peace River areas, we all live in small communities – towns, hamlets, Métis settlements, First Nations, clusters of acreages, or farming districts, where the closest neighbour may be a few miles.
However, how many of us really can say we experience that small town feel? Are we practicing the art of neighbouring?
One of the descriptions of a neighbour, Lawrence says, is people who know you know your dog’s name, but not yours. Those people you see often, know some things about, will check in on you if you don’t see them for a while, but don’t hang out with you.
There are three types of relationships which humans need, said Lawrence: family, friends, and neighbours. All three are important. However, society as a whole has lost the emphasis on neighbours.
As the nuclear family concept has taken hold, we have become more isolated. With technology, many people search for connections online. It is very difficult to build a relationship online or over the phone. Part of this is the importance of non-verbal communication (body language, tone, etc.). It is much more difficult to communicate online than in person. A lot of what a person means is indicated by these clues which are lost online. Therefore, it stands to reason that those relationships which include face-to-face interactions should be healthier.
Building strong and connected neighbourhoods has a positive effect on all aspects of social life from safety to economics. In the Oct. 11 Slave Lake Lakeside Leader court report, a neighbour tackled a man in the street who had broken into a garage and stolen a bicycle and other things. I don’t know this neighbour’s relationship with the victim, but he must have cared to go to all of that bother.
Small towns have a trouble recruiting and retaining professionals. As a reporter, I interview lots of people new to the community and ones who have been here for years. Many on both sides are (or were) planning on staying for a year or two. Those who stayed got connected. A good way to do this is by welcoming new people to the neighbourhood with some food.
Let’s be small town in both population and feel.